my parents. my dad's parents. my mom's parents. probably their parents. parents of my friends. my mom's friends marriages. my friends. 50% of marriages end in divorce. i feel like i'm on the bad end of that percentage. everyone i know is either getting a divorce or is unhappy or having an affair. fuck that.
relationships are stupid. after 18 years of marriage people can divorce eachother and hate eachother and cry everyday because of that person or have an affair.
it's bullshit.
why do we put ourselves through this?
i loved him. i trusted him completely. some thing i never told ryan i told him. things i would never tell anyone. he knew me more than anyone. but it's funny.
he knew things i've done and thought.
but he could never put them all together and understand me. it's like you learn all these equations in math but don't know how to use them. you've memorized them. but you can never put them into practical use in life.
he never really understood. but that's a hard task to ask of someone.
i want to walk to richmond. that would be good for me.. exercise. outdoors. a project to put my mind to.
like that will ever happen..
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